One month down the hatch...four more to go!

I made it through my first month...holy crap! That is insane. Last year at this time I had totally given up. Like I said before, I was full of excuses! But this year, there isn't anything stopping me. I will get to my results from my check-in with Rob, but first I'll go over some of the hurdles experienced this week.

This week has been a total doozy. From crazy work shenanigans to being tempted by work parties...I was living a little hell. I will say, I almost had my first meltdown. Earlier in the week, I had some crazy drama unfold at work. While it was due to some unnecessary actions on my part, I felt jilted once again with the outcome of the situation. Again, I was frustrated and could have just given up like I have done before. Or at least given up on the evening-diet or gym or both. But I didn't. I continued on to the gym after the horrendous day...and it was worth every damn minute I counted down on that f-ing elliptical.

Then, on to looking like an ass...on the same night! I got to the gym-planning to do cardio. Rob had requested I do cardio all this week to prep for my weigh-ins on Friday. I did not want to store additional water in my muscles from lifting. However, when I got to the gym, most every cardio machine was taken. Rob hates the elliptical, and refuses to let me on it (which honestly, is my favorite form of cardio-probably because it is the easiest for me!). So, trying to obey his word, I head over to the treadmills. There are 5 open....I try the first one, doesn't turn on. Neither does the second. Or the third...and you guessed it, the fourth doesn't either.

YOU'VE GOT TO BE FREAKING KIDDING ME!

At this point, I said, "Fuck it, apparently I am not meant to get on the treadmill." I didn't head to the fifth one, because at this point I look like an idiot hopping from machine to machine...and headed straight for the elliptical. Inside I was rejoicing! But I seriously was looking like an idiot for about ten minutes, and not going to lie, it bruised my pride a bit! 

Rounding out the week, on Friday, we had an amazing day of fun at work. My boss is turning 40 and we decided to celebrate in style. We decorated his office and had great perks all day long. It started with Lamar Donuts, Juice and McDonalds. Sweet...I love that shit! Um, yeah, think again, Lauren. From there, we went and saw the premiere of  The Hunger Games: Catching Fire. We had won a challenge several months ago and that was our prize...and what a better day to celebrate! Well, it was an amazing movie, however, again I could not partake in the popcorn, soda and ICEE's that were floating around the theater. At this point, I was still holding strong. I sat with my Nalgene bottle and drank my water contently.

Then came lunch. In honor of my boss' birthday, we had a nacho bar. You name it...it was on there. Two different kinds of queso, green chili, shredded chicken, ground beef, guacamole, sour cream...it was pure torture. I sat there and watched EVERYONE devour it. I was crying on the inside...a tear almost came out. I became more and more bitter and contemplated just have a little bit. But I didn't. I knew I wouldn't be able to stop. I didn't even eat the red velvet cake...I stayed strong. I went back to my desk (cursing all the way there, mind you) and ate my chicken and avocado.

But it all paid off! I met with Rob on Friday afternoon and did my measurements. I have lost 3 pounds (currently at 126), 4 inches and 2% body fat. Hell yeah! Seriously, I am so proud of myself. I don't really feel a difference yet, but I know it is coming. Tomorrow starts the real training. Rob said this last month was just for consistency and learning. I am now on a no-dairy diet and am working out 7 days a week. 4 days lifting, 2 days cardio and one HIT with Rob. I have been doing the lifting since Saturday...and I love it!

I won't lie, I cheated a little bit this weekend...knowing that I am full steam ahead from this point on. It is beast mode time from now until April 12. Rob wants me to come in at about 110-115 very lean and cut. We have a lot of work to do. That means it is go time...no Starbucks. No dairy. No salt. Nothing. I can make it happen, but it is going to be hard. I got this.


LD

Being patient and positive IS difficult

Hey guys!

Wow, I thought I would write so much more often but I feel like there aren't a lot of updates. This is my last week of this diet and workout routine. As Robb says, I am working on my lifting form and consistency. That's great and all, but it gets frustrating not seeing anything on the scale change. I mean, come on! I feel like after a month of eating clean (really like a freaking bird!) and working out more than I have EVER...I would like to see some progress. It is hard to be patient and positive. Another Robb-ism given to me today was, "Being hard on yourself is just like being negative-so stop!"

I am nervous to do my measurements on Thursday. I think I am nervous because I am not sure if I have lost any inches. I better have! Haha. It has been hard seeing the transformations Robb has gone through with his girls...and noticing that I am bigger than they were to start. I went to the Rocky this weekend (the biggest fitness show in Colorado) and it was absolutely inspiring, but again worried me that I  would be able to get down to that body in 6 months. While I know I am capable of anything I put my mind to, man I don't want to have to go more than six months to make this happen.

There is always another show. 

 I mentioned my concern to Robb and my friend Jess...and that was their response. Those five words made me work out harder last night. Make me have more strides per minute than before. I do not want to wait more than six months to accomplish this. I want to be able to reach my goal the first time.

I have two more days of cardio (tonight and Wednesday) before measurements. I am doing my best to kill it and make things happen. On the plus side, I got hit on at the gym for the first time ever Sunday. It was the weirdest feeling ever. Almost creepy. The dude followed me around the gym for an hour- doing similar machines and weights. After about an hour, he started waving at me and smiling...to which I politely smiled and continued with my workout. Rude? Hell no, I am there to workout! Haha. But I did look pretty awesome that day...Exhibit A:

The totally cliche and douchy mirror pic!

Last, but certainly not least, I have learned discipline-especially today. I have learned to not let outside factors dictate my success or attitude. Within the last couple weeks, there have been many hurdles and challenges that I have faced that were extremely frustrating. The old me would have just given in or given up...and let those situations take the best of me. Regardless if it was temptation or difficult situations or poor attitudes, often times I would wallow in them and give up on what I had going for myself. Most recently...

                                   

                                   

This morning my battery was dead in my brand new car. Seriously, extremely annoying. While I could have played the damsel in distress and made excuses of how this would affect my workout or prevent it, I didn't. I took my damn workout bag out of my car, loaded into my loaner...and moved forward with my day. I will be there tonight. Doing my best to get me there.

 I got this. 

LD

Fuel

It is so interesting how different emotions can target or attack certain aspects of your being. Even crazier is how they affect people differently. When people are sad, some binge, some starve and some remain the same. The same goes for stress.

Anger and frustration can also take a toll on your body. Coming home from a horrible day at work, I found myself having two different emotions running through me. It was weird.  I wanted to run as fast as I could and beat the shit out of my training today. I felt like I could conquer anything. But at the same time, my anger and the day was so upsetting, I just wanted to give up. I tend to get in pessimistic moods when multiple things don't go my way. I feel like the world is against me.

 Knowing that I couldn't let the day get the best of me, I went to the gym. I had a wonderful workout, and burned more calories in my cardio than I have done lately. I hit my strides harder, I rocked out to my music a little bit more. I made it happen. Let your emotion be the fuel for your release. Give yourself time to detox everything that is going on -reflect on the good and release the bad. While I was still frustrated after my workout, I let it out. I released the stress.

It also really helped that I had an amazing time with my friend Jade tonight. It is important to surround yourself with people that raise you up. We laughed and joked about my frustration...and had a little retail therapy. These emotions are definitely necessary to balance out the negativity that overcomes you. Surround yourself with good people.

Before I started my workout today, I got a chance to talk to a girl in the locker room who just finished her workout. She was looking in the mirror, examining her defined stomach muscles. I couldn't help but think she was a little too tan...not going to lie...so, I asked her if she was doing a show. While she didn't look to be ready in my eyes, she looked really great. The girl explained she was doing the Rocky this weekend and had lost 85 pounds throughout her training. She was doing it on her own-no help from anyone. What drive and inspiration! I wish I could be as strong as her. WOW, kill it girl.

Tomorrow is another learning day with Rob and I can't wait! I tend to get nervous right before...but immediately am so excited as soon as I leave. Additionally, I am excited to report that I had the accomplishment yesterday to get the farthest I have run without stopping. I don't know what helped me, whether it was the rhythm of the song playing on repeat or my praying...but I ran a half-mile before stopping once. While that doesn't sound like an achievement...I previously couldn't go two minutes without stopping. I suck at running. And breathing. Yep, you heard it here first, folks. I made it six minutes and twenty-nine seconds. I think I am ready for a marathon now! Haha, yeah right.

But I am getting stronger.


LD

Perfect..

Gavin DeGraw

Everything Will Change

Take those boots off the shelf
Wipe that dust of yourself
Even if you've been through hell; you're back
It's time to separate the men from the boys
And the women from the girls
And the tools from the toys
Even if you're freaking out: just relax

Hey, before it gets too late
Before the night is over, before the world's awake
Everything will change
Hey, I feel it coming on
Starting like a fire, tonight you lit the flame
Now everything will change

Back when it used to hurt
Took you a little while just to find the words
Losing, well, it sometimes burns, but you keep moving on
You've got to grow strong like you're leading the nation
Got to make the best out of this situation
Get your hands up like it's a celebration
And you keep moving on

Singing hey, before it gets too late

Before the night is over, before the world's awake
Everything will change
Hey, I feel it coming on
Starting like a fire, tonight you lit the flame
Now everything will change

(Ooooh)
Now everything will change
(Ooooooh)
Everything will change
(You can talk the talk-talk, but you can't walk the walk-walk)

Take those boots off the shelf
Wipe that dust of yourself
Even if you've been through hell; you're back

Hey, before it gets too late
Before the night is over, before the world's awake
Everything will change
Hey, I feel it coming on
Starting like a fire, tonight you lit the flame
Now everything will change

It'll change
(You can talk the talk-talk, but you can't walk the walk-walk)
If you don't try
(You can talk the talk-talk, but you can't walk the walk-walk)
It'll change
(You can talk the talk-talk, but you can't walk the walk-walk)

151 days til beast mode...

Doesn't seem that long huh? But to think six months out...that perspective changes quite a bit. 151 days of dieting, cardio, weights and shenanigans. Dang...well, at least we are almost to 150 days in about 10 minutes. Here I am, 11:53 PM, wide awake writing this because I had the brilliant idea to drink coffee at 9 PM. I took my best friends kids to Starbucks to mourn the loss of their hamster...and I am now mourning the loss of my sleep!

On a positive note, we are now down another week. I keep telling everyone I feel stronger and am learning so much more about my body and muscles. I can't thank Rob enough for how much help he is to me. I still think he has a heart attack every time we train...and is freaking out about how much time we have to get me where I need to be. I am down two pounds, to 127.2, however I think I primarily have just lost my water weight. Rob says that I am focusing right now on getting all my exercises in perfect form and transitioning from fat to muscle. I will tell you though, it can be frustrating eating all this crazy stuff and not seeing results on the scale. I just keep telling myself, it will come. And December, it is supposed to get cray cray crazy. On the plus side, Rob told me I can eat Thanksgiving Dinner as long as I don't gorge! You bet your sweet ass I will be taking advantage of that cheat day.

Well, I figured out how to eat my eggs. I added some mushrooms and onions to the mix and scrambled them with the bacon this time. Mission accomplished. New problem...I have to start running. I may hate running more than I hate eggs. Every once and a while, out of pure inspiration or anger, I will be able to sprint for longer than a couple minutes. Most of the time, I want to die after a minute on the treadmill. Rob trash talked me in our last session and I did run A LITTLE...but  that was nothing compared to the came the bombshell that followed. NO MORE ELLIPTICAL. Wait, what?! Seriously...cardio sucks as it is...and you want to take my only quasi-enjoyable form?! I am petrified. I tried over the weekend to ween myself off the elliptical and it was miserable. Again, pray for me.

I am planning on going to Runner's Roost to see a specialist about how I can get into the swing of things. I think right now my muscles aren't conditioned too well for running...and my calves are extremely miserable about 2 minutes in. Hopefully they can be my saving grace so it isn't miserable for the next... 150 days, 23 hours and 54 minutes.

On a personal note, I am getting my confidence back and am HAPPY. Yep, four months later and I am starting to be stronger than I was before. There are a lot of promising things going on in my life...and I am so excited for the future. I had an amazing weekend spending time with my family and one of my most favorite people ever. Football Sunday was a little tempting at the bar, but I came out of it unscathed. No beer, no nachos...water for this girl! Making progress.

The coffee still hasn't worn off, but I am pretty sure I will curse myself in the morning if I don't try and get some sleep. Thank you all for reading...and your tremendous support.

Stay tuned, it's getting good :)

LD

Made it through the first week...

Hey All!

Yep. That's right. Made it through the first week, bitches! While it is a small feat, I will take that accomplishment. The week seemed to go by pretty smoothly. While I was sore pretty much the ENTIRE time, it is starting to be something I crave. Well, I crave the weightlifting. I still despise cardio.

Ohhh...training with Rob on Friday was insane. I have never done a dead lift in my life. NEVER. Let alone what seemed like a million of them. You name it, we did it. Kettle Ball dead lifts. Dumbbell dead lifts. The list goes on and on. On the plus side, I realized that I am getting stronger. I also realized that I can be sore in more areas than I can count! This time, however, my back and hamstrings were the areas I wanted to die over. Wow. This time, the soreness lasted four days. My squats and lunges only lasted three.


A lot has happened since we last had our little chat! Most importantly, was I ate those damn eggs. They were still gross. I had the brilliant idea to add salsa to them, which was a great addition, however, I should have warmed it up. The salsa made the eggs cold and more difficult to choke down. I managed to get through about 2 scrambled eggs before I started gagging. While they weren't as bad as I had thought, I would never choose them off of any menu. And to let you in on a little secret, I only plugged my nose for the first three or four bites! Haha, how awesome am I?!  My mom tried to take a picture, but I refused. Here was my breakfast, and no, I do not want to hear how delicious it looks. It wasn't. Plain and simple.

I also had another pretty new moment for me...I bared my stomach in a costume for Halloween! Who am I and where did the old Lauren go? In true Lauren fashion, I decided that I didn't want to wear my Mario costume to the costume party. Between the tutu being SUPER large...and just being asked if I was Tinkerbell, I couldn't take it! So, what did I do? Changed it up last minute...literally at 4pm the night of the party. I did the best with what I had...and came up with an Indian. But, it would entail baring my midriff. While I was super self-conscious...I knew I was working towards a better body and thought I would start gaining that confidence back! So....here it is!

There have been, however, many temptations along the way. My best friend's baby shower was on Saturday...dang, I wish I could eat all the good food they had there! Plus, she gave me an entire case of wine for helping her. Are you freaking kidding me?! I LOVE WINE. It was a great time, I brought my food with me and looked like a hobbit eating my apple in the corner...but I made it happen! I also have come into several other temptations...let' me give you a taste of these:

But instead, this is the story of my life...

After this week, I am seriously sore. Last night my best friend/bitch friend Kelli (you know I love you soooo much), laughed at me as I tried my hardest to get off the couch without screaming in pain. She literally about lost it. While it was funny, and I know I looked retarded, I was doing anything I could to move without dying.  It took me five minutes to get from the couch to this position...

 I have learned a lot about me and who I am since I started this challenge. I am gaining back my confidence. Not just the confidence I lost in myself, but also the confidence I had in life. There are still some rough times where my faith and confidence is being tested, but it has to only make me stronger. The past couple of months have been extremely heartbreaking, and to be finally coming out of that has been a journey. I have a lot of support going through this-friends, family and co-workers. It has been truly remarkable hearing how many people are behind me and excited to hear my progress. Thank you. And a big thank you to Whitney...thank you for keeping me motivated and encouraging me at the gym on our lift days! I appreciate you...and our complaining and vacation plans!

Until next time...

LD